The Refer-conundrum-humdrum

Eeny Meeny

Ah, the referendum. The conundrum and the humdrum. For all the banter and the debating and the guff. For all the newspaper headlines, columns of print and rhetoric, I am still sitting on the fence and this fence post is digging right up my arse. The one thing I am goddamn sure about, is that there shouldn’t be a referendum for such a HUGE decision. Next they’ll be asking us whether we should invade North Korea, or hire a hitman to get Prince Andrew. I mean, I’m fairly intelligent – I’ve got a degree for god’s sake. Ok, I know that means fuck all. I’m a trained teacher… well, yes we know what respect teachers get in this country. I’M A HUMAN BEING and therein lies the problem. We should be leaving this whole debacle to the non-human beings among us: the politicians. We’re being fed what they want to feed us anyway (cow’s shit tastes better). Then we wouldn’t have had to spend weeks answering the hairdresser/Tesco checkout assistant/Facebook friend: are you voting in or out? and listening to aforementioned person spewing a whole load of bollocks back at you that they’ve just read in the Mail. Or worse, reading those Facebook posts where Joe Blogs is suddenly an expert on EU politics, immigration, foreign exchange rates and how many millions (or is it billions?) the national health service is set to gain/lose.

But you know what the worst bit for me is? The thing that is really pissing me off, is that not only have we got to suffer Donald Trump’s face splashed everywhere at the moment, we’ve got Boris Johnson’s bonce everywhere at the same time! Whose fucking great idea was it to juxtapose those two twats in the news?

Who do we believe? The twat with the hair, the toffee nosed twat, the twat that has a mouth like a muppet, the twat who doesn’t even live in this country and who leads a country where you buy a gun with your pint of milk….oh, so many twats to choose from.

Eeny, meeny, miny, mo
I don’t know which way to go
If I vote ‘in’ will it be right?
If I vote ‘out’ can I sleep at night?

It’s a worry. I’m floating like a fibrous turd. Yes folks: apparently it’s turds like me who are going to decide the future of our country.

ALL TOGETHER NOW:

Woah, the Hokey Votey,
Woah, the Hokey Votey,
Woah, the Hokey Votey,
Ref-er-en-dum, blah, blah, blah!

6 thoughts on “The Refer-conundrum-humdrum”

  1. This made me giggle 🙂 yes trump and Johnson face everywhere has gotten very tiring. Being in Ireland I’m very interested to see what way the vote goes but I agree with everything you’ve said #bloggerclubuk

  2. I think one of the biggest problems is the run up to this vote has lasted for what seems like forever. They’ve exhausted everyone with their debates and tit for tat arguments. They started their campaigning ages ago and I’m not sure what the benefit was as people are on the fence or jumping between both camps. #bloggerclubuk (also I have huge respect for teachers, you guys take so much crap!)

    1. Totally! It’s just one huge, long, drawn out debate that gives everyone almost too much time to think!

  3. I have to say that I’m delighted this referendum isn’t going on in Ireland because I wouldn’t know what to vote!! It’s all over the news here – I can only imagine how much it’s on over there. It must be head wrecking by now. Thanks so much for sharing with us at #BloggerClubUK x

    1. Yes…bored now. Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored….and then you have to remind yourself that it’s actually a really important decision you are yawning about!

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