This post is looking at the concept of perfectionism versus excellence. I am relating my thoughts mainly to the teaching of martial arts. However, the same concepts are transferable when we are teaching our children as their parents, the way in which teachers at school are teaching our children, the way you may be experiencing being taught as an adult. We must not confuse excellence with perfection. Striving for excellence is a personal journey. Striving for perfection is usually trying to follow someone else’s path.
Life is a journey
Life, as we all know, is a journey. It takes us to some amazing places, some scary places and some shit places. We meet so many people along the way: some travel with us the whole way, others only for a part of it. Some of the people we meet on our journey aren’t very nice and others change our lives forever. For some people their destination comes sooner than they were expecting and for others the journey is long.
Teaching is an evolving journey
As a teacher I am always reflecting: thinking about what made a class good, or what didn’t quite work. On how students learn and thus on how to teach. Teaching for me is a journey in itself and my perspective is often changing. I actually feel that it is evolving, because I feel that I view things in a better way now.
Martial Arts provides a structure
Martial Arts are highly structured and disciplined – this, of course forms a great deal of their appeal. In a world that feels chaotic and we often feel out of control, martial arts remain a constant.
Perfection is someone else’s standard – it is an illusion
There are many types of martial arts. Each one has its own benefits and many of the benefits are shared throughout all of them. Sometimes, however, I feel that instructors strive for perfection, borne out of a misguided conception of the Art. Of course it is important that standards are kept high, but standards remain, with the best will in the world, subjective. Perfection is an illusion. What’s perfect to you will not be perfect to someone else.
In Taekwon-do, there is no right or wrong answer to getting a move correct. The answer is fluid. It will depend on interpretation and is subject to Chinese whispers, as Grand Masters pass their knowledge to masters who pass it to instructors.
Striving for perfection is demotivating – make yourself happy by trying your personal best
So those instructors, or indeed any sports coaches or teachers who strive for their idea of perfection are, I feel missing good teaching techniques and goals. Put martial arts, for example in the context of people’s lives: for most students it is a hobby. One that keeps them fit and strong just like other sports do, while at the same time providing them with a structured goal setting system. This is highly motivating, until you get an instructor who is pushing for his or her idea of perfection at every stage. Let’s contextualise it again: there are few other sports or hobbies that strive for perfection in order for you to do brilliantly at them. Watch a game of international football and plenty of mistakes are made, but overall the standard is often high. As teachers, coaches and instructors we should not expect the student to make us happy by trying to be perfect. They should be trying to make themselves happy by doing their personal best.
Excellence is personal and inclusive
I believe that Taekwon-do instructors and other coaches need to approach their teaching with a broad mind. Striving for blanket perfection of a technique may seem like an admirable goal, but it is an exclusive rather than an inclusive way of teaching. How can someone with a disability, for example, be included in this approach? How can an older, less flexible person be made to feel that they are succeeding? What about a person who lacks power, just because that is the way they are made?
It is about being as excellent as you can be, rather than as perfect as someone else thinks you should be
Striving for perfection with students is a demotivating method. Take a teacher in a school. They aren’t looking for the students to get 100% all the time. They are encouraging each student according to what is expected of them as an individual. A student whose teacher is looking for perfection will never feel that they are getting anything right. As parents we can be guilty of this too. It is not about lowering standards, it is about individual goal setting, encouragement and support. It is about being as excellent as you can be, rather than as perfect as someone else thinks you should be.
Striving for perfection will never make you happy
For too long I feel that some martial arts teachers have failed to see students as individuals. I have seen this on my own teaching journey. I myself in the past have expected students to be able to do more than they are perhaps capable of at that time. If a student is striving for perfection, they will never be happy, no matter what they achieve.
Motivate with personal targets, rather than demotivate with unachievable expectations
So my teaching journey has now brought me to a point where I see every student with their own abilities, strengths and restrictions. I am not putting any limitations on what they can achieve and I will push them as far as I can, with the knowledge that I am motivating them every single step of the way, rather than demotivating them with my own unachievable expectations. This way, they will achieve so much more than they ever would with the goal of perfectionism. If you never feel good enough, your journey will end.
