The Bitter, Shameful Truth

Think of something in your house that you are ashamed of. No need to shout about the stash of chocolate you’ve hidden from the kids, or your grey underwear though.

I am ashamed of our fruit bowl. Today it looks like this (again):

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Shameful. What message is it sending to my children? That fruit doesn’t matter? Perhaps even more importantly, why do we have such a great big fruit bowl, with its sexy, bright, enticing Aztec design, if it just isn’t pulling the fruit? Why don’t we just swop it for one of those little wicker basket ones you get in caravans, that are only ever used for a week at a time. No, we have to have a huge great bucket of a fruit bowl that we can’t even afford to fill without selling a dog (no one would buy a teenager).

I’m also ashamed, because the only regular additions to the fruit bowl are lemons to enhance our gin. Fruit that nobody wants to eat and therefore it’s not even one of our 5 a day. And the bitter truth is, that the larder isn’t even full of tinned fruit, but full of tonic. The strawberries in the fridge go so well with Pimms.

MHM Gin

Occasionally, a mango has been known to fleetingly grace the bowl. Blink and you miss it, because a mango shared between 6 people, that takes about 10 minutes to carefully peel and dice, lasts approximately 5 seconds from plate to mouths. Bananas look wonderful while no-one is eating them. They bring the fruit bowl alive with their vibrant yellow hue and then when people finally decide they would like one, they have turned into brown mush, that on closer inspection nobody wants to place in their school bag. Another fruit for the graveyard, along with the tangerines that have too many pips and the peaches as hard as bullets.

But the lemons live on. The last bastions of hope in the wasteland that is, my fruit bowl.

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16 thoughts on “The Bitter, Shameful Truth”

  1. This made me smile!! Oh we all have one of these fruit bowls. The ‘going off’ fruit that goes into a smoothie redeems my guilt when I am having a healthy phase but currently my bananas are languishing alone getting a major tan! This really epitomises the funny guilt trips we put ourselves through as mothers and maybe looking at that fruit bowl is doing that to you!! Lou at http://www.peppermintcove.com

    1. Hi Lou, I think that you’ve hit the nail on the head with your mum guilt trip comment. Wow – you’ve given my post a deeper meaning, thank you!

  2. Haha, I love that your organised enough to buy lemons for your gin. Once this baby is born I can’t wait for a gin and will be making sure hubby has bought lemons The frit bowl in our house is always full but that’s just because no one eta the fruit I buy, it sits there until it goes bad and then I bin it and by more..it’s all very pointless really!xx #fortheloveofBLOG

  3. Pass the gin and don’t be shy with the limes πŸ™‚ we are more of a frozen fruit and smoothie type household. Fresh fruit just dies in our house just like your bananas! #fortheloveofBLOG

    1. I’ve never had a negroni but it sounds delicious (I googled it ) I’ve obviously led a sheltered life! What a great reason to keep oranges in the bowl! Thanks for commenting.

  4. I’m sure we all have things in our homes that we feel this way about. The fruit bowl is always full in my house because I’m obsessed with eating fruit but there are plenty of other places that I wouldn’t want to share with the world. Maybe go wild and buy some strawberries for your fridge instead of your fruit bowl. If all else fails, they taste lovely at the bottom of an ice cold rosΓ© πŸ˜‰ Thanks for sharing on #fortheloveofBLOG

  5. Frozen fruit is definitely the way forward. We smoothie it up once a week and other than that we are a banana-only house (children and dog all obsessed so they don’t get a chance to go brown). But no other fruit, I’m afraid. I have my gin neat. πŸ™‚ #fortheloveofBLOG

  6. Our fruit bowl often looks like this but generally because my teenagers are pariahs when it comes to fruit. If they are not grabbing it on the go they are whizzing it up into some smoothie or ice cream liquid concoction. I try to keep it topped up to prevent the family filling it with keys and bus passes! I do like a bowl just filled with loads of lemons and limes too – looks stylish and then there is always a reason to pour a G&T!! #fortheloveofblog

    1. It’s funny you should say about filling the bowl with keys and bus passes…this IS what happens Are you spying on me?! My kids bought a smoothie maker and used it for five minutes before it being consigned to cupboard space we don’t have! Thank you for commenting.

  7. I love this post, my fruit bowl is a glass one that I have now taken to putting a pretty tea towel in so that it hides the little amount of fruit that is there. Even when my bowl is full it’s only oranges as nobody really eats anything else.

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